Get It, Girls



"The girl and the woman, in their new, individual unfolding, will only in passing be imitators of male behavior and misbehavior and repeaters of male professions. After the uncertainty of such transitions, it will become obvious that women were going through the abundance and variation of those (often ridiculous) disguises just so that they could purify their own essential nature and wash out the deforming influences of the other sex. Women, in whom life lingers and dwells more immediately, more fruitfully, and more confidently, must surely have become riper and more human in their depths than light, easygoing man, who is not pulled down beneath the surface of life by the weight of any bodily fruit and who, arrogant and hasty, undervalues what he thinks he loves. This humanity of woman, carried in her womb through all her suffering and humiliation, will come to light when she has stripped off the conventions of mere femaleness in the transformations of her outward status, and those men who do not yet feel it approaching will be astonished by it. Someday (and even now, especially in the countries of northern Europe, trustworthy signs are already speaking and shining), someday there will be girls and women whose name will no longer mean the mere opposite of the male, but something in itself, something that makes one think not of any complement and limit, but only life and reality: the female human being." Rilke

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How beautiful! Garance calls it “The Soft Skin.”

How beautiful! Garance calls it “The Soft Skin.”

My Girl on the Friday Workday Slump

    Me: Pk, before you leave

    Me: I need a pump up. I am tired and have this cough

    Me: I just need to get to 5:00

    Me: Can you give me something?

    Pk: Oh yes I can

    Pk: Ok. The reason Fridays are so hard, is b/c you are so close to your destiny

    Pk: You have worked really hard to realize what it is that makes you tick and what it is that you need

    Pk: each friday is even CLOSER to that goal. it's like you could lean out and kiss it

    Pk: there is an exhaustion w/ that

    Pk: but the truth is, with each passing hour, you are teetering further on the edge of glory. and pretty soon it is gonna be this sublime free fall

    Pk: those are the words i have. but if you know waht's good for you - you'll queue up the flo song for your lunch break

    Me: you're the fucking best

    Pk: remember the edge of glory

    Pk: hang on to the precipice

    Pk: feel the way the wind feels from up there

    Pk: it's impt too

    Pk: i'm gonna light candles and think about you

    Pk: k?

"First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches. May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty. When the Crystal Meth is offered, may she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half. And stick with Beer. Guide her, protect her when crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age. Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels. What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit. May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers. Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen. Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait. O Lord, break the Internet forever, that she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers. And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed. And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it. And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back. “My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes. Amen."

— Tina Fey, praying about her daughter

"I do believe it is possible to create, even without ever writing a word or painting a picture, by simply molding one’s inner life. And that too is a deed."

— Etty Hillesum

Helen Mirren interview

Helen Mirren is classy and smart and different and I love her shoes in this picture.

I’ve got to say, despite your reputation as something of a free spirit who likes to have a good time, I’ve been finding you unexpectedly frightening.  Be afraid. Be very, very afraid. For a start, I’m not a party animal. I see myself as rather boring, a rather straight-arrow kind of person who wanted to be free, and I’m constantly searching to liberate myself from my own insecurities and my own uptightness. I think a lot of my work has been a weird attempt to liberate myself, but it’s not altogether successful. That’s my dichotomy.

So good. The socks aren’t my style, but look at the smirk!

So good. The socks aren’t my style, but look at the smirk!

Kim's Blog

Kim is a friend who I knew for a too-short time. She died this April after a really unfair and brave fight against breast cancer.  Kim’s life was much shorter than any life should be, but she lived it HUGE and left a lot of inspiration here for the rest of us. Her blog gives honest and piercing insight into what it feels like to live on the edge of death and, I think, how to do it right.